This Could Actually be the Dumbest Case of Tobacco Piracy …… Ever
If dumb blonde jokes were not politically incorrect, this tobacco piracy story would rank right up there with the very best ever told. It doesn’t matter if these two are blonde or not. It would only take a little tweaking to make this fit the stereotyping required to complete the image and story. This is also one that will make you want to slap your forehead as the episode keeps falling down the hill. Read and be amazed. They walk among us and breed.
As Written By Jazz Shaw for Hot Air:
I’ve written here many, many times about the problem of tobacco piracy and how it’s entirely driven by out of control sin taxes applied unevenly across the states. So entrenched is this problem that it’s become something of a way of life in states like New York, Illinois and Connecticut. But there was a case in Missouri this month which may just take the cake in terms of not only how widespread the problem has become, but how incredibly stupid some people act when attempting to profit off of this illicit trade. It took place in the small town of Foristell, just to the west of St. Louis. (St. Louis Today)
Police in the tiny town of Foristell, responding about 2 a.m. Thursday to a report of marijuana smoke coming from a motel room, arrested two women from New York who tried to escape by jumping out a second-story window and running half-naked across Interstate 70.
Then things got weird.
Back in the motel room, police didn’t recover the alleged pot, but they found a different kind of smoking material: about 160 cartons of cigarettes.
The women admitted they had driven around the St. Louis area in a rented car buying them up, with plans to sell them back in New York.
The number of things which were hilariously wrong about this story make it too good to pass up. First of all, these women were going around the city and buying up cartons of smokes at the vastly lower price than is charged in New York. So far, so good. But they were using a relatively small car to transfer their loot. 160 cartons may seem like a lot, but they were spending around fifty dollars per carton for them. You can’t sell them on the black market anywhere near market value so they might have been able to make roughly twenty bucks a carton profit. Split between two people that’s roughly $1,500 dollars each. Now subtract out the cost for gas, meals and several nights in hotels and these ladies probably weren’t going to clear even a thousand dollars profit for their trip. Professional smugglers get larger vehicles which they outfit with secret compartments capable of carrying ten times that many……..
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