Making sure you raise conservative kids should be your number one priority.
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It’s Father’s Day today and I can’t think of a more important job than raising your kids right. Don’t believe me? Well then, I have two words for you: Bowe and Bergdhal.

As much as some stretch-panted lesbian might try to marginalize the role of fathers with their mullet-headed, misguided, misandristic Weltanschauung, the stats clearly state that when pop is in the house, and he properly doles out TLC, the kids come out as a great asset to the planet instead of selfish jackasses.

And that’s what our country needs: parents raising kids who love God and our country and don’t cost our nation one red cent, but rather add tremendous value to this great experiment in self governance.

Y’know, sometimes I wonder if Obama had been properly fathered then maybe our country wouldn’t be so embarrassed, in debt and internationally laughed at right now.

Therefore, and herewith, are nine ways you, the young dad, can make certain you don’t raise a kid like el presidente.

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