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Times are dark for lovers of freedom and common sense across the country. But take heart, America: At least none of us suffers under the strange, goofy tyranny that is Canada.

The latest exhibit example of bizarro totalitarianism comes from the Ottawa suburb of Barrhaven, reports the Ottawa Sun.

Last week, a daycare called Centre de l’enfant aux 4 Vente suspended two-year-old Faith Murray for three days because she snuck a processed cheese sandwich a few feet onto the premises.

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