The Empire has struck back — at the United States.

The Galactic Empire’s public relations division has issued a press release (via the Star Wars blog, of course) reasserting its military might — and laughing at the United States for not building a planet-killing Death Star-style weapon.

Part of the story is no joke: An official petition urged the U.S. to begin building a real-life Death Star by 2016 on the White House’s We the People website. When it received 34,435 signatures, President Barack Obama’s Administration did indeed disavow plans to build the science fiction weapon — in a very cheeky and clever response.

The Empire responded:

“It is doubtless that such a technological terror in the hands of so primitive a world would be used to upset the peace and sanctity of the citizens of the Galactic Empire,“ said Governor Wilhuff Tarkin of the Outer Rim Territories — in a press release from Imperial Center, Coruscant. “Such destructive power can only be wielded to protect and defend by so enlightened a leader as Emperor Palpatine.”