The exact cause of asthma is unknown – until now, that is! At a town hall gathering the President trumped the entire global medical community and declared that coal is the evil villain causing asthma. “The challenge with coal is that although it’s very cheap, it’s also dirty. And it can create the kinds of air pollution that not only is contributing to climate change but is also creating asthma for kids nearby,” the President said. And he knows a thing or two about medicine – like how those greedy doctors are needlessly pulling out tonsils and amputating the feet of children for monetary gain.

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